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Subtle Signs That You Have Moved Forward From Your Divorce

Posted on in Divorce

Subtle Signs That You Have Moved Forward From Your DivorceYour emotional attachments to your marriage will likely persist after you have completed your divorce. You can truly say that you have moved past your divorce when the memory of it no longer dictates your actions or weighs on your thoughts. It may take months or even years to reach this point, depending on your personality and circumstances. The paradox of getting over a divorce is that you will know that it has happened when you no longer think about it. Here are four subtle signs that you have emotionally recovered from your divorce:

  1. You Are Not Triggered By Reminders: There are some things that you naturally identify with your former spouse. It can be as random as a song, food item, outfit or conversation topic. When you experience one of these things, you are immediately reminded of your marriage. You may always associate these things with your former spouse, but you will know you have gotten over your divorce when this recognition does not lead to larger thoughts about your marriage.
  2. You No Longer Keep Track of Your Former Spouse: Immediately after your divorce, you may be curious about your former spouse’s activities. Social media has made it easier to keep track of your former spouse than ever before. You are comparing each others’ post-divorce lives in hopes that he or she does not find happiness before you. Seeing that your former spouse is dating again or having fun makes you angry and jealous, even though it has no effect on your life. When you have moved on from your divorce, information about your former spouse’s life will not phase you because you no longer compare yourself to him or her.
  3. Divorce Does Not Dominate Your Discussions: It is easy to tell that you have not moved past your divorce when you are always drawn to the subject during conversations. This is particularly noticeable when you compare a person you are dating to your former spouse. Moving on from divorce means you are judging your new relationship on its own merits. When people ask you what your marital status is, you say you are single instead of divorced.
  4. You Can Have a Civil Encounter with Each Other: You can prepare yourself for interacting with your former spouse if you know you will be seeing him or her. It is during a surprise encounter that you may become emotional. You avoid interacting with him or her because you are afraid that any conversation will quickly turn into an argument. The awkwardness will always be there, but someone who has moved past a divorce can be civil around his or her former spouse and even ignore attempts to bait him or her into an argument.

Post-Divorce Preparations

To help you move on from your divorce, you need a divorce agreement that you feel settles matters between you and your former spouse in a satisfactory manner. A McHenry County divorce attorney at Botto Gilbert Lancaster, PC, can help you negotiate your divorce settlement. Schedule a free consultation by calling 815-338-3838.



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